The Door Keep Slamming

Few words: When life gives you lemon, you find juicer, open lemonade stall for money; then you hope life gives you lemon every day.



Despite me saying all those positive words in my blog opening, I’m actually not that optimistic after all, at least that can’t be apply in my current situation. Not in the madness I’m going through right now! "Look woman! Blog is everything for a blogger, so don't you what-if-you-blog-about-it to me when you don't know a thing" my heart whispered while I quenching my fist listening to your sarcasm. Let me tell you why I blog, it’s something like self-reflection or self-seeking or whatsoever you want to call them. In other word, I’m using this blog as a media to see what kind of jerk I am/was/will be and hopefully with His blessing and maybe your blessing as well, I can turn the table around. The thing is when someone is really aware of their slip-up and trying all they could to amend it, give them a chance. If they are constantly repeating the same slip-up, remind them. If they still don’t change, then only you give your final red card. You don’t give red card first handed when someone coming with ‘I’m sorry’. What’s wrong with you? When people coming with ‘I’m sorry’ meaning they’re aware of their slip-up, so please save your extra piece of your mind. They come asking for your forgiveness not asking your opinion. You don’t give them an extra kick when they come defenseless, not? You don’t get it, don’t you? Ah, screw it. If you want an official apologize, I could, in fact I did. If you want me to tell you how sorry I was, I would because I’m real sorry for that even I doesn’t know a small joke like that is able to generate a WW3. Seriously, if I were to compare to the jokes I made, this is like a nano scale joke, but still I apologized because I respects you. You already know how much it takes for an egoist to come out with ‘I’m sorry’, the least you can do is try to appreciate their effort; no matter how much you hate them, just give them a yellow card for starter then listen to what they want to say, not giving the red one straightforwardly. Referee doesn’t throw red cards like Texas Hold ‘Em All for the reason there won’t be any game left when everyone is out. Understand that woman! Ah, screw that too. I’m not in the mood to reason with you. Ah, screw everything.

………….

I could really use a juicer right now. Say, who want lemonade?

Word That Came Out So Many Times

Few words: Marijuana isn’t a drug, it’s a plant. If that is the case then Korean drama isn’t a drama, it’s a drug.


Sometimes people just lost control of themselves. They spit out what’s on their mind before their brain even have time to rephrase it. Sometimes people just overlooked the boundary between joke and insult. And without knowing it, they’re stepping on somebody tail. But the thing is it’s just a thin stroke to tell apart between joke and insult; of course it does also depend on how you see it. That’s what make human ‘human’.

If you are a follower of MLMB from day one, you already realize I joke about everything; from my breakup story to getting dump, from my amateur French kiss to my botched first date. Basically I joke about everything, because I treat the world less seriously by considering only the funny side of life. I guess everyone will literally get bored of life when it’s all no joke basis. And of course sometimes I’d walk pass the boundary but as soon as I grasp a grip of reality, I’ll do my best to amend it.

A month ago, I recklessly joke about something that might hurt the feeling of someone. Well, I’m not good at bullshitting so it’s something to do with stuffed sleeping tool or maybe a slight into childhood memory but frankly speaking, I don’t know she can’t take it. By the way, do you guys know what it feels like when your joke rejected? It’s like you’re stepping on some land mines which is more or less what I get after that joke. Sensing the tense atmosphere, I apologized immediately.

Of course, my apology is rejected.

And apologizes continue for the reason I don’t like being hated and sit there doing nothing to amend it. I have also thought of uploading a snapshot of me crying begging for forgiveness, but that will be, obscenely nauseating. So the idea is slashed off right away.

Of course, my requests for forgiveness are all ignored.

Again, I’m not good at bullshitting, so I don’t know you’re not a big gas type of girl. I don’t deny I can be a jerk and so heart breaking at times, but after knowing I’m ahead of the boundary, I will without end try to amend it. Nevertheless, after trying everything with the same outcome, that will be, I don’t know, the end?

It’s alright with me if you continue hating me; I already had a dozen of them waiting to ambush me when I’m all alone in the toilet. But like I said, I had tried to save the friendship and that’s pretty much the most I can do. It won’t work if the other side doesn’t respond to it, not? Trust me, if I had your number, I will even call to apologize. Well, it’s just going to be another half year before I totally vanish from your view. Until then, take care and “I’m sorry junior”.

You should have felt the sincerity since I’m blogging this in the midst of study week. Bah! More books to eat. Bye!