안녕하세요

안녕하세요 An Nyoung Ha Seh Yo! (Hello)

I know, I know, I know that I didn’t update my blog for a long time. Don’t blame me. Blame my lecturers, they keep on giving me assignment and more assignment; exam after exam; quiz after quiz and report after report. It’s hectic and it’s indeed a super busy week for me.

But then I still have my weekend to blog right? “Oh! You caught me!”

Okay to be frank, there are reports, assignments, quiz and I’m really busy during weekdays. No kidding, the only time left for me is to bath, eat and sleep; or maybe a few round of DotA. I mean I still have my daily routine to do right and DotA is part of it.

Have I give up on blogging? "Hell no!" I like blogging and I'm more than happy to share what on my mind. Reading my readers' mails and feedback is totally off the chart; priceless. It’s the only place where I can speak what I want without any restriction; it’s a totally free-to-talk zone for me.

Then why I stop updating my blog for so long?

Lazy? Part of it.
Busy? Part of it.
Korean Wave? Bingo!

I’m so into the Korean Wave, doesn’t matter whether it’s Korean drama, Korean song or Korean dance. I am just so into it that I have no time to blog; thanks to my two little tiny friends, Miss Sprinkle and Miss Direct-Junior for sending me so much Korean stuff.

Now if you really realize, I don’t speak Korean or even understands it. I may know English, Malay, Cantonese, Mandarin, Japanese, Hungarian, Dutch, Russian, Spanish and a mouthful of other native mother tongue but I don’t understand Korean at all. Then why am I so into it? It’s their emotion and their feeling in their song. Yes I admit I had no idea what they singing but from the tone of the song I can actually interpret their meaning in a more or less way la. They really put some magic powder in their song. If it’s a sad song, you can actually feel the sorrow from their song. If it’s a love song, you can too feel their love. But so far I had never come across any dirty Korean song; wonder how it *cough* feel like *cough*.

Their dancing rock too! Their choreography is superb! Just see the way they move with the song; marvelous. I’m so into Korean dance; it’s so cool. They can move so fast, so graceful that it matches with every of my heartbeat. Nonetheless I have to strongly make it clear here, that I’m not any fanatic fan of Korean Wave. I just admire their culture and trend.

Speaking of Korean, I got to admit, their sense of fashion rock too. I’m impressed with the way they dress and I’m not talking about woman only, it’s even for man. I like their hairstyle the most. I think those Korean must be spending day and night waxing, perm, straightening, dyeing and styling their hair because it look like a piece of art to me rather than just hair.

Whoa! I’m talking like some Korean fanatic fan. I think I better stop talking now if not I'll really sound like one. I’m not a Korean fanatic fan but I'm open to more Korean stuff.

안녕Yo Uii!! (Bye)

No Fire Already

“You have no balls!” if you saying this to me a few years back then, you’ll get a nice wallop from me. Most probably get a few punches on the stomach and then my infamous finishing move: Wall of Jericho. Then you wake up the next day in some Intensive Care Unit. But if you were so lucky to say that to me now, I’ll like “Sure, whatever makes you happy” and you’ll just walk away with no injuries; lucky bastard!

See!? You see that?! You see that don’t you?! That’s a major change leh. No fire already leh.

Frankly speaking, everyone love to win and nobody want to lose. That’s the norm of life. You don’t believe it, don't you? Let me show you. You want to raise salary; you have to win over your boss. You want to date hot chick; you have to win over their heart. You want a wife; you have to win over their family. And accordingly, so we can’t blame anyone for wanting to win.

Nonetheless, I’m far different from the humans' norm; I can die to win. Die leh, no joking leh. Yes I’m no god and I can’t win every time but what the heck. I just win as much as I could until every of my defeat can totally be ignored. Naïve huh? But as naïve as it sound, it actually make sense. You won a million times and only get beaten a few times, then peoples will only celebrate your victory and nobody will talk about your lose. Wrong! A big NO! That’ll only work in your dream or fantasy but when it comes to reality, it’s just about how you see and deal with it.

You can actually change your lose to victory if you know the secret. That is not any big secret actually because everyone has it but just that they don’t utilize it. A rather simple mental trick; be positive! There’s a scientific name for it but it’s rather long, nevertheless just for you guys reference; the scientific name is Bepostivethinkpostivedontbenegativedontthinknegative Everythingpositiveandnothingnegative.

Observe the below cases:

Case 1: OL’ FIRED UP MELS

A: You got no balls!
Mels: Say that again and I’ll pull your balls out.
A: You got no balls!
Mels: *pull*
A: Argh! My balls!
Mels: *VICTORY!*

Case 2: NO FIRE MELS

B: You got no balls!
Mels: Sure whatever makes you happy
B: … *beh soong face*
Mels: *VICTORY!*

It’s all about how you define your victory. Who say victory only come when you’re all fired up and beat him to cry or pull his balls out. If you realize, the positive conversation is shorter and more pleasant; and it involved almost no action at all, why waste energy on a scum like that? Won’t the world be a better place if everyone thinks positively? So everyone starts to think positive today and there’ll be less guy-without-balls. And of course a better world to live.

Hardest Question

Just reached Ipoh this evening, not that I hate to come back to my hometown but the journey back is just too boring. Just imagine four hours (or maybe more) of journey without anyone to talk to and without entertainments; the only thing to do is staring at the never ending window scenery: plain trees and never-ending cars panorama. Anyhow what really matter is that I reached Ipoh safely.

Hello Ipoh! I’m back!

Today, it will be a new experience for me as I’ll be buying my own bus ticket, checking on my university holiday on my own and most probably going back Ipoh alone; but there’s no one to blame, because that suppose to be my duty from the start. Just that I’m too rely on someone. Anyhow, as usual I’ll be taking a cab back to my house. I went to the taxi stand and ask for a cab, and they gave me a mid 50s years old Chinese driver. They called him Uncle Chong.

My journey back was indeed an interesting one because Uncle Chong is there to entertain me; more like digging up information from me. Although this journey is only seven kilometers (or maybe less), but Uncle Chong is able to freeze time. He makes my journey double long. Yes! Freaking double long!

Anyhow, below is our conversation:

After I put my luggage in the back of the cab,

Uncle Chong: So, you just came back?
Mels: Yes, from Perlis. *obviously* (Hello, that’s why I bring my luggage)
Uncle Chong: What’re you doing there?
Mels: Studying.
Uncle Chong: That UUP?
Mels: No, Uncle. It’s UniMAP.
Uncle Chong: So you ‘kena’ already?
Mels: Huh?
Uncle Chong: H1N1 la.
Mels: No la.
Uncle Chong: Then why you came back?!
Mels: (I was going to answer “What your problem?” but) Holiday la, Uncle.
Uncle Chong: So you’re still studying huh?
Mels: Yes, Engineering.
Uncle Chong: So is it hard studying?
Mels: Erm…it’s depend, if less assignments and report, then it’s not that hard.
Uncle Chong: If with assignment and report, then is that hard?
Mels: Yeah.
Uncle Chong: What so hard reading a book? I let you drive my cab and you let me study. How’s that?
Mels: … (I did SPM and STPM but I really don’t know how to answer his question)

I don’t know whether Uncle Chong is trying to tease me or advise me, but from the tone of his; it’s more like he still want to study or he is looking for a successor in his cab driving career. But if you're looking for a successor, no thanks cause I'm one hellish bad driver.

Anyway thanks Uncle Chong, at least it rings a bell in me. I’ll study harder. *cross-finger?*

Those Good Old Days

Nothing motivates me even just to move. Earlier today, when I was waiting for the bus I borrowed my friend mp3 player. Just in case you guys don’t know, bus waiting is usually something boring and almost true to say it’s a disaster. Visualize yourself standing in the hot burning sun, not to mention carrying those books and files.

Just to kill time, I need her mp3 player. She was refusing to borrow at first and that triggers my curiosity even more: “Now, what she store inside her mp3 player?” Anyway, after a long persuasion, I finally get her to agree with me.

Honestly, there is nothing special inside her mp3 player, just some old songs; to be precise; songs that I listen to when I was a teenager (most probably in my secondary school years). Listening to those song seem like a time travel to me. I was once again teleport back to my teenager life. That is the time when we are so into S Club Seven, Backstreet Boy, N’sync, M2M and many more.

Being a poor kid, there is nothing much that I can do back then. I can’t afford any of the rich kids’ toys: neither Nintendo, Playstation nor computer. What I have is just my family old television, a radio and may be some antique 2D tetris gamboy. I may be richer now, but I somehow still miss my old day’s entertainments; at least they're happy-simple-easy things.

There are many silly things I did, for instance writing diary is one of them. I’m not talking about one or two diaries; I’m talking about serious diary writing, until I often ran out of books. For a secondary two kid to have a habit of diary writing is indeed something outlandish. Nevertheless I have no one to share my thoughts with; all I have is diary. They’re certainly a good listener, tell them your problem all you want and they will listen to every word you wrote on them with no complains. Somehow I fall in love with writing.

Talking about silly thing, I still remember me staying awake on Wednesday late night just to listen to my favorite radio program. When its 12 am sharp, I’ll plug in my earphone and tunes into Hitz.fm just to listen to their top 20 songs. That was the time I really fall in love with music, especially Bryan McKnight- Back at One, it kill me every time. I even recorded every single of them in cassette; you might still find them in the storeroom.

That was the time when I’m free of problems, that was the time I just live my life happily. I’m just a simple kid; like every ordinary kid. There is nothing special in me, I’m just a shy nerd who wears a big frame glasses with a heavy bag. Back then I was not as athletic as I’m now, to be honest I can’t even pass my 100 meters run and I nearly make a fool out of myself during long jump practice.

Well, there’s someone I need to thank to for introducing sports in my life. I guess he’s enjoying his life in UK now. Anyhow, thank you JM for introducing basketball in my life. He’s the one who relentlessly invite me over for a game or two and he’s my first mentor that teaches me a few tricks on basketball. We both are a fan of Slam Dunk comic, so we click along very well. I still remember that I can’t wait for every Friday to come, because that’s the day JM drop by my house, had our lunch or maybe a game or two of Red Alert, then we are off to the nearest basketball court. That’s the happiest moment of my basketball memory and no doubt, it’s the nicest sport I ever played.

Because of my passion in basketball, I had chosen to practice under several coaches. First of all, practice is not mended to be fun. That’s the time, I had the most number of cramps in my leg; that’s the time I’m being push to my limit every day. Slowly but surely I’m better at basketball, that’s the time I started to kick ass. Due to my uncountable ass kicking, I was appointed to represent my area. When it comes to competition, that’s the time when the coach started to put ‘winning is a must’ in your mind. In order to win, I become fiercer in my game, more cunning and I did splendidly in my every game; for the reason that I’m thirst for victory. I take basketball into another level, that’s when I started to play with the senior team; state players and national players. But JM wasn’t playing with me anymore. Maybe because I want to win so badly, I can’t control my temper; maybe because I’m good at it, I become vain or maybe because of this, no one want to play with me anymore.

Years later, I become a regular player in the league but then I start to realize that the happiest basketball moment is when I’m playing with my bunch of friends. They may not be as challenging as those players I met in the league, but at least we had a good time laughing at each other mistakes. Being under so many different coaches, I have developed numerous of skills and strategy; some I discover myself and some teaches by the coach. But one thing I find difficult to correct is the way I do my shooting; because you teach me so. Come watch my game, maybe you’ll realize I still do the same fake lay ups and the same fanatical turnover that you teach me.

Thanks JM! At least now I can brag over with some brats that this nerd finally has a sport that he is good at. And it come handy when I need to charm some girls. Anyhow at least I’m proud to say I know a sport and I still love it.

Those old days were surely something for me to smile for. Nonetheless I think I better return her mp3 player now before she kill me.

First of August

My mind is blank, staring at the alarm clock. It’s already 2240 now and there’s only an hour plus for me to remain as twenty one. Twenty one maybe a breakthrough for every teenager, as that’s the official age of being acknowledge by the society that they’re legally adult. Hence, being twenty one is more or less a dream for most of the teenagers.

“My dream did come true last year.”

But then I realize, being twenty one or as an adult, has its own agenda. Things are not that entertaining anymore and it’s time to get serious. Your parents will not treat you as a child anymore, that’s the time that you need to take responsible over every word you said, that’s the time you have to decide when you’re ask to make choice, that’s the time you know that being twenty one might be something not-fun-at-all. That’s the time when you wish that you never grow up.

“Welcome to twenty one.”

Throughout the age of twenty one, I started to think and see things differently. When you’re still a kid, your mum will tuck you to bed every night and whenever you had a nightmare, your mum will surely be there for you. That’s when you’re still a kid. When you’re already twenty one, you’ll forced to constantly deal with reality nightmare and there’s no one for you to hold on. That’s the age when you seriously need to learn to sleep.

The year of twenty one is no more a playground for you. That’s when you learn how to take responsibility in your life. There are so many things to learn either orally or not verbally. Nobody will take you as a kid anymore. Every word out of you holds a big conscientiousness. That’s the time you learn how to control your words, your emotion and your tone so that you won’t hurt others.

Being twenty one change my perspective a lot.

From an introvert guy, I start to change to a more sociable guy. I start to realize how important friend is. Trust me; being alone is the last thing you wish for on this earth. I start to make friends, yes I admit that not every friendship last but what the heck; I did make friend right?

I learn how to control my temper. I know temper helps a lot in leadership and getting people to work with you, but you don’t always need it. Sometimes we should try to solve problem in a more casual way. That’s time when I learn to laid-back when there’s no need to be firm.

I learn that winning is important, but there’s a time that you need to lose in order to win. So as to win, from time to time we must learn to be defeated. Just by admitting your minor humble defeat, you can save the whole world; that’s the real triumph that everyone desire. That’s time when I learn to lose.

Ego is important to guys, as it trigger confident to the max. But too much ego in one will eventually lead him to his self destruct. That’s time when I start putting down my armor and start to live as a humble one. It somehow enlightens me that humble life sometimes can be interesting as well.

The age of twenty one is when I seriously think about setting down. No more fooling around. Be a man that girls can trust, be a man that girls can be with and be a man that cares. I learn that to maintain, one must sacrifice and to sacrifice, only one shall maintain.

I learn that as a human being, the greatest blessing god has given us is our feeling. With this feeling, we are able to form bonding, relations, friendship and even family. Nonetheless I also learn that the greatest disaster of all mankind is their feeling too. Feeling tend to make one tears, one hurt, one miserable and one heartbroken. I had gone through a hellish time with feeling and I seriously learn my lesson.

I had lost a lot throughout my year of twenty one, yet I manage to gain a lot from it too. The world is round and she needs equilibrium too, when you lose something, eventually you’ll get something else as your replacement. The only problem is how are you going to face your loss and accept your replacement. Bear in mind, nothing will be the same anymore with this new replacement. But when you really ready to let go of your loss, and accept the replacement; you’ll be surprised by what you can gain out of it.

I had lost someone I respect and look up to the most, but I gain the real meaning of family.

I had lost myself for quite a long time, but I gain the new me.

I had lost my time over the sea, but I gain memory over the rainbow.

I had lost love, but I gain care.

I had lost ego, but I gain respect.

I had lost in everything, but I gain something from each of everything.

I had lost you, but I fought.

Frankly speaking, my age of twenty one is not a happy one, as it only adds cuts and scars to my heart. But each scar teaches me a different lesson, and each cuts call for a different healing.

Years later I may forget, but somehow these scars will ring a bell to remind me. I guess it’s time for me to take a leap into a new chapter of my life, a new page, a new beginning starting with (since it’s already twelve):

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MELS!!

May your wish come true and let’s hope for a
happy twenty two.